This is Major Diz Astor Of The TEA And Crackers Homeland Security Department speaking. I'm pleased to inform you that our agents deep undercover in The Political Rabble Rousing Granny Susan Steffen - Kraft's terrorist group The Raging Granny Menace have intercepted a warning from afar today directed at Granny Susan personally and her terrorist group The Raging Granny Menace generally. This warning is thought to be from friends of Granny in far away places. A Spud Slapping Fatwa is thought to have been issued against Granny and her group for their involvement in The Pocatello Potato Pricing Protest. As a result of this warning Granny Susan and The Raging Granny Menace are said to be in hiding. At this time we do not know exactly where Granny Susan and her cohorts are hiding but rest assured citizens we are monitoring the situation and will keep you informed.
Well it would seem that your friends and family are not the only ones that think you live dangerously Granny. Are you insane? You can mess with Light In The Loafers Lindsey Graham , Sen. Raul Labrador and the other assorted Washington D.C. fuckwits but only a Granny with a Death Wish takes on The Idaho Potato Farmers. Good luck Granny with that Spud Slapping Fatwa .
Major Diz Astor
The TEA And Crackers Homeland Security Department
1-800 - get - trgm
There they are in all their terrorist glory friends The Raging Granny Menace.